CrankCast

Zombies vs. Vampires in English Culture

2010-12-18T20:47:00.000-08:00

Playing with Google's cool new Book Ngram Viewer is fun. The data set is some 500 billion words culled from nearly 5.2 million digitized books in multiple languages starting in 1500. Read more about the project on the NYTimes.

I of course ran a quick diagnostic to see the relative frequency of zombies versus vampires. See graph below.

Vampires have enjoyed a longer history with a huge upswing in recent years but appear to have peaked. Meanwhile, zombies, true to form, are slowly but surely gaining ground, shambling upwards and onwards.

Crank's Zombie Newsletter Issue #02

2010-10-27T18:41:00.000-07:00

It's a big weekend for zombie enthusiasts. With Halloween comes hordes of shambling corpses, moving from door to door, bar to bar, and brain to brain.

The Walking Dead premieres on AMC Sunday 10p/9c

The acclaimed, NYTimes-bestselling graphic novel The Walking Dead finally comes to the small screen this Sunday night. Written and directed by Frank Darabont (Shawshank Redemption) the show looks amazing. If you're in SF, join me at Isotope Comics this Sunday for a special early screening Sunday night at 8pm.

Plants vs. Zombies ON SALE! 99 cents!

Game-maker PopCap is celebrating its tenth anniversary and Halloween with a sale on all its games, including the immensely popular Plants vs. Zombies, now available on iOS (iPhone & iPod) for just 99 cents. Get it now cause the sale won't last.

Left4Dead 1 & 2 $9.99 each

Meanwhile Steam, the iTunes of PC (and Mac) gaming, is offering half off on Left4Dead 1 & 2, making each zombie first person shooter just ten bucks. If you're on Steam, my username is crankarms.

Down the road...

The film adaptation of Max Brooks's World War Z continues on schedule. Brad Pitt's production company Plan B optioned the book back in 2007 and it was recently reported that Pitt himself would be starring in the oral history of the zombie war slated for a 2012 release. I'm curious to see how they adapt WWZ's case study-style to the big screen, with Marc Forster directing (Finding Neverland, Quantum of Solace) it's got an A-list production and talent team.
Natalie Portman has left the film adaption of Pride and Predjudice and Zombies. Still attached as a producer, the project looks to be in limbo.

Lay it out

2010-05-04T16:11:00.000-07:00

I've been missing playing ultimate on real grass. Check out my not-so-triumphant return to grassy fields with these great photos. I almost had the d.

Photo credits:
Left photo by Jasper Weinberg
Right photo by David Wolf

A Very "This American Life" Christmas

2009-12-19T17:56:00.000-08:00

In the next few weeks many will likely be sitting in trains, planes and automobiles as we travel back to celebrate the holidays with family and friends. Make sure you load your iPod with holiday cheer to put you in the mood.

Here are 6 great holiday episodes of the always entertaining NPR show "This American Life." All six can be downloaded in a .zip file here or they can be streamed off the TAL website from the links below.

#6 Christmas - With fantastic music from the Faith Tabernacle Baptist Church choir throughout, this episode features Sedaris's comedy troupe, the Pinetree Gang, as well as stories from juvie and Christmas time at Faith Tabernacle.
#47 Christmas and Commerce - The extended version of the radio broadcast that made David Sedaris famous, Santaland Diaries, his tale as a Macy's elf, easily makes this one of the best episodes out there.
#87 A Very Special Sedaris Christmas - After writing the Santaland Diaries, Sedaris would be asked to do more Christmas stories every year for various publications and shows, making him "that Christmas writer" for the beginning of his career. Here are three of his best, read by Sedaris, Julia Sweeney and Matt Malloy.
#201 Them - Only the second act is Christmas-specific, and in it David Sedaris compares and contrasts the jolly, gift-bearing American Santa with the slaver, kidnapping-prone Dutch Santa.
#255 Holiday Gift-giving Guide - Proof that buying gifts for your parents will forever be hard. Plus a 1959 recording of Truman Capote reading his "A Christmas Story" and a story of a chain of events, starting at a Christmas tree farm in Maine, "the Pine Tree State."
#305 This American Life Holiday Spectacular - It truly is a TAL all-star line up with stories from David Sedaris, John Hodgman, Sarah Vowell and several others.

And if you need more TAL to fill your traveling hours, check out this list of 13 Great "This American Life 1-Acters" complete with links for downloading.

I hope these shows help you pass the time as you head to your destinations this holiday season.

13 Great "This American Life" 1-Acters

2009-12-12T13:33:00.000-08:00

Steph and her sister Alexis were at one point discussing great single act episodes of the great radio program This American Life. An uninterrupted hour of radio programming is increasingly rare, and not just any topic can withstand 60 minutes of dissection by microphone. These are sprawling and in-depth masterpieces of radio reportage.

Here are some of our favorites. See here for details on how to download each episode or click the name of each episode to stream is from TAL's site. Donate to TAL here.

#84: Harold - A story of Chicago's first black mayor, Harold Washington.
#121 Twentieth Century Man - Perhaps MY favorite episode, it's like Mad Men, all crammed into on man's life and shattered across his many families and every cultural shift that occurred in the US from the 50s to the 80s.
#168: The Fix Is In - The basis for the new Soderberg movie The Informant, starring Matt Damon
#199: House on Loon Lake - (awesome story about finding an abandoned house)
#204: 81 Words - The story of how the American Psychiatric Association decided in 1973 that homosexuality was no longer a mental illness.
#206: Somewhere in the Arabian Sea - The War on Terror - A Personal Comedy (missing from download folder)
#218 Act V - High-security prisoners perform Hamlet
#292: Arms Trader - The War on Terror - The Failed War on Terror
#355: The Giant Pool of Money - Perhaps their best show ever. It's got everything.
#360: Switched at Birth - A true story.
#365: Another Frightening Show About the Economy - Economics 101.1!
#367: Ground Game - Stories (separate but tied together) from the 2008 Pennsylvania primary (not really one story, but they are interwoven well)
#390: Return to the Giant Pool of Money - skip the first half, but the second half tells you where the folks from the original episode are one year later

Crank's Zombie Newsletter Issue #01

2009-11-01T10:39:00.000-08:00

Check out the excellent trailer for a remake to George Romero's 1973 "The Crazies".

The haunting trailer ends with a montage of mayhem as the soundtrack lilts with Michael Andrews/Gary Jules cover of Tears for Fears' "Mad World" (attached here for your enjoyment). Popularized in Donnie Darko and the award-winnging Gears of War ad, that cover is quickly becoming the next "Lux Aeterna." Related, I'm sure Clint Mansell could score an amazing zombie film soundtrack.

The progression of symptoms of infection here provide an interesting twist to the genre. The resulting "zombies" seem to be a cross between Firefly's "reavers" and 28 Days Later's "infected." The main character, played but the always great Timothy OIyphant (Dead Wood, Live Free or Die Hard), has this awesome "Walking Dead" Officer Rick Grimes thing going on (in that they both similarly harken back to that older trope of "small town sheriff"). Also, the locale in a rural town allows for the possibility of an awesome corn field scene. "The Crazies" is playing in San Francisco at the Red Vic Theater May 20 -22. Who wants to come?

"...Normally for Killing"

2009-07-10T20:52:00.000-07:00

Get Your Cyborg Name

Other times...for kuddling...deadly kuddling.

crankphone53

2009-07-08T01:10:00.000-07:00

"tiny tin toys"

Zombie iPhone

2009-07-05T20:42:00.000-07:00

This is what a well-prepared zombie saftey officier's iPhone should look like. Notice the weapons, flashlight and medical information are always accessible in the dock at the bottom.

This is the result of my research on the best zombie iPhone games.

6 (Sorta Free) Zombie iPhone Games

2009-07-05T18:00:00.000-07:00

While the iPhone has many pracitical purposes, from balacing your personal budget to staying in touch with friends, first among its crucial uses is honing one's zombie-blasting skills. There are tons of zombie games and apps out there, but how do you know which are worth forking over 99 cents for? Here are six great games you can test out for free since they all have free "lite" versions. Check them out and get your Ash on.

Zombieville USA: This straight-foward side-scroller has everything a zombie game should have - shotguns, chainsaws, gatling guns, flamethrowers and a neverending flow of zombies. Run from house to house picking up ammo and cash and upgrade your gear between levels. Keep low, keep moving and keep shooting. $1.99 or try the lite version for free.

Zombie Attack: No list of zombie games would be complete without the requisite tower defense scenario. The game is simple - build and upgrade your array of swinging axes, sentry guns, flame towers and cannons to keep the unyielding horde of unded from destroying your little shanty. The tilt controls to move about are surprisingly responsive and force you to focus for a quick jolt could send your lone survivor into a crowd of zombies. $2.99 or try the lite version for free.

Kids vs. Zombies: Playing "fort" as a kid, I always lacked the hordes of attackers to futilely through themselves on my masterfully constructed barricades. Kids vs. Zombies solves that with zombie hordes and three different juvenille defenders. You've got your sling shot (sniper), Nerf gun (machine gun) and water balloon launcher (mortar) with which to dispatch the advancing horde. With some creative tilt contorls, the 3D environment shifts so you can look downfield or straight down. Between levels spend money to upgrade your fort, weapons and even your teammate's AI. $1.99 or try the lite version for free.

iZombie: Death March: With beautiful lighting effects and a variety of level designs, iZombie is perhaps the most creative game of this bunch. Each level offers a slightly different take on zombie blasting, with different control mechanics. One level finds you using your flashlight to spot approaching baddies to blast while the finale has you steering a pickup truck through a horde of undead while a huge rancor-like like monster stomps after your Chevy. 99 cents or try the lite version for free.

Zombie Trade Wars: What's an entrepreneurial survivor to do in the midst of the zombie apocalyspe? Make a lucractive living off the anarchy-induced black market. For those of who rocked DopeWars on your TI-83 in the back of calculus class you'll be well-versed in the game's mechanics. Buy goods (shotgun shells, zombie bitekits, gas masks, etc.) low one place and sell them at a higher price elsewhere. Random zombie attacks, outbreaks and encounters will cause you to gain or loose goods and drive prices up or down. 99 cents or try the lite version for free.

Trapped: Undead Infection: This is the game the unplayable Resident Evil: Degeneration should have been. With retro low-bit graphics, the game puts the emphasis on convuluted, amnesiac storytelling and puzzle solving, evident from the weak fighting and shooting mechanics. The game has a reptive rhythm of "find X so you can open/operate Y" and it grows wearisome retracing your steps and reblugening the same zombies you just felled looking for some clue youoverlooked. But the copoious save points make it easy to jump in and out of the game, so you can quickly slip into a ghoul-infested secret science facility while you're riding a commuter-crammed public transit bus. 99 cents or try the lite version free.

crankphone52

2009-07-01T04:21:00.000-07:00

"muggles"

crankphone51

2009-06-27T03:08:00.001-07:00

"high wire high rise act"

crankphone50

2009-06-25T02:11:00.000-07:00

"to to to to Totoro"

crankphone49

2009-06-24T04:41:00.000-07:00

"quack attack"

crankphone48

2009-06-21T22:48:00.000-07:00

"bubble seats"

This is part of a new substream of crankphone photos I am starting to publish called "pattern recognition." They make great iPhone wallpapers!

crankphone47

2009-05-30T09:28:00.000-07:00

"i ain't afraid of no ghost"

crankphone46

2009-05-29T00:01:00.000-07:00

"portal and wall"

crankphone45

2009-05-25T21:46:00.000-07:00

"terminator toys"

crankphone44

2009-05-18T04:41:00.000-07:00

"adventure requires a sidecar"

crankphone43

2009-05-15T20:49:00.000-07:00

"quack quack quack"

ze frank would like this.

crankphone42

2009-05-07T04:48:00.000-07:00

"can you hear me now?"

crankphone41

2009-05-04T22:53:00.000-07:00

"here fishy fishy fishy"

crankphone40

2009-05-01T20:15:00.000-07:00

"thermos fort"

crankphone39

2009-04-27T23:21:00.000-07:00

"high as a... part II"

see part I here.

crankphone38

2009-04-24T03:24:00.000-07:00

"warning!"

crankphone37

2009-04-20T17:28:00.000-07:00

"must learn"

crankphone36

2009-04-20T01:18:00.000-07:00

"beyond the temple walls"

Dear China, Stop Blocking YouTube

2009-04-16T05:05:00.000-07:00

Living behind China's Great Firewall has made me appreciate the unfettered access to information we have in free countries. When I first got to China, I couldn't access any of Wordpress and many Google search results were inaccessible.

However, the important, time-wasting stuff like YouTube remained available. That is, until China decided to block all of YouTube. While China would never say why they are blocking the video-sharing site, it seems connected to videos allegedly showing PRC troops beating Tibetan monks.

It's been nearly a month since China's state-owned ISPs blacklisted YouTube and there's no sign yet that Chinese netizens will be able to watch silly cat videos any time soon. Google told the NYTimes last month that: “Our government relations people are trying to resolve it.”

In reaction to questions about Internet censors, Foreign Ministry spokesman Qin Gang said: “Many people have a false impression that the Chinese government fears the Internet. In fact, it is just the opposite.” Indeed, in point of fact, the Internet fears the Chinese government.

crankphone35

2009-04-16T05:02:00.000-07:00

"latchkey kid"

crankphone34

2009-04-09T21:57:00.000-07:00

"stepho and her nom"

crankphone33

2009-04-06T01:27:00.001-07:00

"water water on a bike"

crankphone32

2009-04-04T02:19:00.000-07:00

"aw nuts"

crankphone31

2009-03-31T23:18:00.000-07:00

"all coked up"

crankphone30

2009-03-29T07:53:00.000-07:00

"here fishy fishy fishy"

crankphone29

2009-03-27T23:43:00.000-07:00

"Pokharian boats"

crankphone28

2009-03-26T05:48:00.000-07:00

"but do you have a flag?"

crankphone27

2009-03-25T05:33:00.000-07:00

"the tree of life"

crankphone26

2009-03-24T01:25:00.000-07:00

"Patan puppy and Coke"

crankphone25

2009-03-18T22:29:00.000-07:00

"Settler of Patan"

crankphone24

2009-03-16T07:38:00.000-07:00

"colorful hobbit doors"

crankphone23

2009-03-15T03:50:00.000-07:00

"sits and eats. i shoots."

Detonator at 2000 FPS

2009-03-12T08:00:00.000-07:00

What do hard-drinking engineers do with expensive equipment? Expensive and awesome party tricks, of course!

Here we have some dear friends back at Dartmouth's Thayer Engineering School putting a $35,000 Imperx high-speed camera to good use by recording the final round of Detonator at 2000 frames per second.

Don't know what Detonator is? It's a brilliantly simple ~~caveman~~ drinking game whereby a circle of ~~cavemen~~ college kids pass a sealed can of beer around. Each one shakes the can, yells "DETONATOR" and smashes the can against his forehead. Pass and repeat until the "winner" has the can explode.

Oh, this reminds me! Don't forget to donate to the Dartmouth College fund!

crankphone22

2009-03-12T03:43:00.000-07:00

"still life with spiky turds"

crankphone21

2009-03-11T03:38:00.000-07:00

"top of the world from above"

crankphone20

2009-03-10T03:27:00.000-07:00

"fat, round, thick-ass vessels"

Zombie Comic Book Now NYT Best-Seller

2009-03-10T02:05:00.000-07:00

The graphic novel is finally getting its due. The Grey Lady has deigned to include graphic books on their own "best-sellers list" in the Book Review section. It's about time. The Times added a comic strip section to their own Sunday Magazine well over a year ago.

And behold! My beloved The Walking Dead graphic novel is on the list at number five. Booyah!

The Times claims that: "Comics have finally joined the mainstream." This is an interesting statement, and one that I'm not sure I entirely agree with. In an effort to save themselves from bankruptcy, comic book companies have been selling of their assets for mainstream movies and TV shows at an amazing pace. But have "comics" really joined the mainstream in that the mainstream is now consuming comics?

Also, The Beat has an interesting discussion with Times as to why the new best-seller list is called "Graphic Books" and not "Graphic Novels."

crankphone19

2009-03-09T02:40:00.000-07:00

"miniature street chicken"

Dear Blog, My Old Friend

2009-03-09T00:09:00.000-07:00

Wow, that didn't take long. I start up a new blog and then CrankCast goes unloved like a three-legged mutt. The new puppy is StephoandCrank.com, for those who haven't been keeping up.

But I'm back. I've gotten wireless setup in our Beijing abode and now I have no excuse but to dump my thoughts onto the internet, right? So, CrankCast, my pulpit, my soapbox, my stump, my lectern, my dais, my rostrum, shall rant on.

There's lots more coming from crankphone, plenty of zombie-related news to dissect and wonderful Chinese things that are new to me.

crankphone18

2009-01-25T17:19:00.000-08:00

"two rides for the price of one"

crankphone17

2009-01-23T10:15:00.000-08:00

"It's more like a hearse"

crankphone16

2009-01-21T09:03:00.000-08:00

"Seizure Tunnel"
Detroit Metro Airport

Wellmas Turducken

2009-01-14T08:39:00.000-08:00

Wellmas Turducken from Craig Rubens on Vimeo.

It took more than five us almost a full day to debone, stuff and cook all three birds. But man, was it delicious.

What I Did Over Winter Break

2009-01-12T10:33:00.000-08:00

Gold, baby!

crankphone15

2009-01-11T09:27:00.000-08:00

"Wine & Coffee"

Taken at The Moss Room.

crankphone14

2009-01-08T11:20:00.000-08:00

"Prehistoric rhetoric"

crankphone13

2009-01-07T09:57:00.000-08:00

"ritual magic"

What's the Deal...

2009-01-06T11:42:00.001-08:00

...with all the Nazi movies? Seriously.

Come on Hollywood.

crankphone12

2008-12-30T08:46:00.000-08:00

"All I want for Christmas is you."

crankphone11

2008-12-28T10:37:00.000-08:00

"Dogs with no master"

These are my late Uncle Kent's two golden labs. Kent Rubens, my father's brother, passed away unexpectedly this November from a brain aneurysm. He was a very well respected lawyer who served in the Arkansas legislature. His memorial service was well attended by officials and well-wishers from all over the Land of Opportunity.

I've heard many stories of Kent's legislative and legal antics and pranks. One such tale was related to me by President Clinton when I asked him if he knew my uncle. He laughed and told that while he was governor and my uncle was in the legislator, Kent bogged down some homophobic anti-sodomy legislation by trying to attach a clause that would make it illegal for legislators to commit adultery. Oh the irony.

Grammy, my paternal grandmother, passed just two weeks after her eldest son. It was a sad November.

Here's hoping for a more healthful 2009.

crankphone10

2008-12-27T17:12:00.000-08:00

"on glimmering wing"

Lego Noel

2008-12-25T12:21:00.001-08:00

Lego Noel from Craig Rubens on Vimeo.

crankphone9

2008-12-22T13:28:00.000-08:00

"workin' the haight beat"

Corruption

2008-12-21T10:37:00.000-08:00

A recent Tom Friedman column asked "Just how corrupt is America?” But in America's defense, the recent scandal involving German Siemens has given us the largest bribery-related fine in history. And let's not forget the Frenchmen at Société Générale who cost the bank $7.1 billion in fraudulent trades earlier this year. Being crooked isn't just an American vice.

How far up and down does the global, institutionalized corruption go?

Savage Cat Bicycle Gang

2008-12-01T20:37:00.000-08:00

Savage Cat Bicycle Gang Nocturnal Ride from Craig Rubens on Vimeo.

crankphone8

2008-12-01T13:54:00.000-08:00

"up on yon hills"

crankphone7

2008-11-25T23:34:00.000-08:00

"oh no barrel"

The Best and Brightest

2008-11-23T16:18:00.000-08:00

From The New Yorker's "The New Liberalism":

"Next January, legions of earnest, overworked, slightly underfed young men and women won’t flock to Washington to map out new government bureaucracies; instead, legions of healthy, casually ironic, extremely nice young men and women will flock to Washington to map out the green revolution. When it comes, it will look more like Google than like the Tennessee Valley Authority."

crankphone6

2008-11-23T12:04:00.000-08:00

"crossed wires"

crankphone5

2008-11-21T10:59:00.000-08:00

"stepho in the midst"

crankphone4

2008-11-19T09:43:00.000-08:00

"meow"

crankphone3

2008-11-18T10:43:00.000-08:00

"school"

crankphone2

2008-11-12T20:06:00.000-08:00

"1615"

crankphone1

2008-11-11T20:04:00.000-08:00

A new photo stream from the exploits of cr.
(all taken with iphone)

"high as a..."

I Totally Crushed Palin Debate Bingo.

2008-10-03T13:17:00.000-07:00

I won on "Special Needs." The winning combo was "Alaska," "Special Needs," "Hockey Mom," "Terrorists," and the free "Air Space."

Colbert Rags on Jeopardy

2008-08-15T15:37:00.000-07:00

Who is Steve Colbert?

Zack's Back

2008-08-12T17:21:00.000-07:00

My New Favorite Evolutionist Dance Hall Beat

2008-08-05T09:49:00.000-07:00

The opening lines of this synth, pop dance beat are refreshingly Darwinian:

The fish swam
Out of the ocean
And grew legs
And they started walking
And the apes climbed down
From the trees
And grew tall
And they started talking

Orca Bait

2008-07-11T00:34:00.000-07:00

Free Willy can't touch this.

And...

Orca Bait - San Juan Kayaking 2008

The Daily Show

2008-05-13T19:27:00.000-07:00

Things I learned at a taping of The Daily Show:

John Oliver is really skinny.
Jon Stewart spent Passover "knee-deep in a chicken parm sub."
The old lady in the front row from Maine has smoked pot.

On the whole, an informative afternoon. The pic above is from the waiting area of two, short, half Jews who didn't observe the Seder. Below are clips from the show I saw taped. I was sitting off on stage right in the VIP section. Yeah, I'm with someone very important.

The Daily Showed first used the R. Kelly impersonator last year to recount Senator Larry Craig's men's room scandal.

Before you watch the next segment, check out Part 1 of John Ollie's Ticket to the Pollies.

So maybe this globalization thing isn't so bad?

WWE? More Like WTF

2008-04-22T13:48:00.000-07:00

I'm crying and laughing and it hurts so bad.

Meet Team Fortress 2

2008-04-15T17:26:00.000-07:00

I recently got the chance to check out Team Fortress 2, a team-based first person shooter of Pixar-persuasions, on a friend's flat screen on his 360. Oddly, our initial encounter was quite frustrating at the lack of in-console multiplayer. This means two contemporaries sitting in the same room enjoying some brews can't also obliterate each in this game but two nine-year-olds with headsets can do just that across the continent while also shouting homophobic epithets.

But that withstanding, we got into the rhythm of passing the controller around for an amazingly entertaining FPS that had the in-house spectators laughing and cheering. The game's mise en scene is strongly reminiscent of Pixar's seminal Incredibles, all the way down to the marketing campaign. The videos below were floated across the internet and do some entertaining character development vignettes. It's machinima on steroids full of wit, whimsy and "wilcos" and worth the watch. Enjoy.

Meet the Heavy

Meet the Engineer

Meet the Soldier

Meet the Demoman

Obama Re: Gore - "I'd tap that."

2008-04-02T23:04:00.000-07:00

Speaking at a town hall meeting in Wallingford, Penn., named the 9th best place to live in the United States by Money Magazine, Sen. Barack Obama was asked if he'd tap Al Gore to be part of his administration. "I would [tap that]" Obama answered.

2008-02-29T00:26:00.000-08:00

What the Buck

From the time warp of YouTube. Such erudite punditry from historically literate jurists.

2008-02-13T10:40:00.000-08:00

Blogku

Lonely little blog
No posts no comments no spam
Won't someone digg me?

2008-01-16T19:34:00.001-08:00

"Honky Tonk Badonkadonk" Everything You Dream and More

I enjoyed quite a bit of a new television station recently made available in the Rubens household this holiday season - GAC, or Great American Country. My mother would often have it on before dinner time with Charles Gibson, who is no Peter Jennings. We'd be treated to a wide array of current country hits from veejays sitting in a festively lit crèche.

This particular video caught my eye. Watch it first, and then follow the textual analysis below:

Trace Adkins
"Honky Tonk Badonkadonk"
Songs About Me (Capitol Records)

This seems to be Mr. Adkins attempt to transcend his country stardom and become a true "gangsta." While he strives admirably he falls woefully short. Bragging about his partying, Adkins boasts of 3 am evenings tomfoolery. Pssh! If you invite any of Snoop's "bitches" they aint leavin til six in the mornin.

Mr. Adkins refrains entirely from referring to women as "bitches." The closest he comes is questioning "them britches."

The only name checking found in the song refer to "Donkey Kong," "grandma," and "grandpa," the latter two deserving of "slaps," Adkins contends. It's still unclear if "the sheriff" Adkins demands telephoned is the constabulary assassinated by Mr. Marley.

The closest Adkins gets to the misogyny and chauvinism of gangstaradom occurs at 2:05. Mr. Adkins waves The Shocker at an ascending stairwell for swinging booty.

Maybe Adkins does understand, in his own way, that why we do it is for the badonkadonk.

2007-12-23T18:23:00.000-08:00

Happy Holidays From The Spark

2007-12-14T19:47:00.000-08:00

Google Pays Blogger Off With Delicious Cookie

I got this from the Google Holiday Media Party.
cookiesbydesign.com

It was delicious.

2007-12-12T17:36:00.000-08:00

The following was a post I wrote for Earth2Tech because I thought it was recent news but apparently this thing has actually been around since January. Oh well. It's still pretty cool, and for those of you who have been to Sioux Falls, South Dakota I hope you appreciate the choice of map selection.

Find the Cheapest Gas or Biofuel with MapQuest

Looking to save a few pennies at the pump? MapQuest has a great feature MapQuest: Gas Prices that allows you to search for the cheapest fuel in your area. Simply enter your zip code and your preferred fuel grade, and MapQuest spits back the prices of the nearest 100+ gas stations, with the dated fuel prices, which you can sort by price or distance.

While MapQuest still suffers from a clunky interface, their new fuel price locater is extremely robust and comprehensive. Not only can you search for gas by fuel grade, but you can search for your favorite alternative fuel -- including biodiesel, E-85, hydrogen, and CNG. You can even use it to find charging stations for your EV. It gives you cool stats like national gas price highs ($4.05 a gallon in Kailua Kona, Hawaii) and lows ($2.40 in Hamel, Minn.), and offers a gas calculator that will calculate the price of a trip.

I'm really enjoying playing around with this tool -- seeing what E-85 is going for in the Midwest, for example, and checking out where one can get hydrogen in California. It's not perfect, however. While good for locating biofuel pumps, it doesn't always include prices; in some cases the prices haven't been updated in months. Still, as someone who grew up in a family that religiously records gas prices and mileage in a notebook in the glove box, this really excites me. What if, every time you fill up at the pump, your car's onboard computer could record all that data and chart it for your on a maplet that you could pull up whenever you're running near E?

2007-12-06T17:14:00.000-08:00

Telsa Roadster Getting Ticket?

A picture is worth a thousand words. I attended the ThinkGreen Conference hosted by ThinkEquity today and yesterday (check out my coverage). Outside the conference venue, the St. Regis on 3rd and Mission, there was one of Tesla's $100,000 roadsters parked outside. Behind those velvet ropes is an all electric, carbon fiber body roadster that can do 0-60 in four seconds without making a sound. And while it can out-accelerate most Ferraris, this roadster wasn't actually getting a ticket. The cop was just standing out of the rain while he wrote up a ticket for a nearby 80s-era Honda. Decidedly less exciting.

2007-12-01T21:04:00.000-08:00

I Am Legend: Awakening

Will Smith, who saved us from aliens (twice) and robots, is set to fight off vampiric savages in the most recent film adaption of Richard Matheson's I Am Legend. This might be the closest we get to see The Fresh Prince take it to some zombie hordes.

In prep for this oddly-themed holiday blockbuster (seriously, this big-budget, monster-ridden, Smith-vehicle has summer popcorn flick written all over it) every bus and bill board in the country is plastered with a post-apocalyptic skyline poster. Additionally, the online ad campaign is ramping up. There's the movie's cryptic website, a Second Life multi-player game, and a beautifully and eerily animated series of shorts from a comic book distributed at Comic-Con 07. I'm trying to get one off eBay.

The book, called I Am Legend: Awakening, consists of five separate stories that document the start of the outbreak. Stories one, two, and four are viewable on the movie's site. Written and illustrated by different artists, including Matheson himself, they provide different facets of the failing struggle against humanities collapse. Stories four, "Sacrificing the Few for the Many," and three, "Isolation," have been made into elegant and violent animated shorts. They aren't embedded here because they really deserve to be watched in HD on Apple's site (linked above). Episode three was just released last week and I'm hoping as the feature film's December 14th release date approaches the remaining stories will also be posted.

This is not the first time Matheson's I Am Legend has gotten an illustrated treatment. Steve Niles, who also wrote the first story in the Awakening series, wrote a comprehensive graphic novel adaptation of I Am Legend back in 1991. I'm still working my way through Kirkman's excellent The Walking Dead series, but I might jump over the check out Matheson's and Niles's works before the movie drops.

2007-11-29T10:55:00.000-08:00

CNN * YouTube Debate

Last night the Republican Presidential candidates spent an inordinate amount of time mincing words of immigration, enumerating the firearms they possessed, and explaining which baseball teams they root for. Mitt Romney dodged nearly every question while Mike Huckabee's amazing oratory proved that his recent poll gains are not undeserved.

I got my mail today and opened up the latest from my NetFlix queue, the all-Amerian tour-de-Willis that is Live Free of Die Hard, and was amused by the ad on the inside. I wonder if those ads are connected with the movie enclosed. Here's the ad. I'll post more of the these NetFlix ads in an attempt to track any trends.

2007-11-19T07:55:00.000-08:00

CrankCast Vid Picks: Chuck Norris

Are you a presidential candidate lagging in the polls? Need something to give your numbers a little boost? How about something to give your campaign a roundhouse kick to the face? Republican Presidential candidate Mike Huckabee has just the thing.

So there you have it. Huckabee is out next president because, like the man said, "Chuck Norris doesn't endorse. He tells America how it's gonna be." And this is (almost) completely serious. Norris extolls Huckabee's virtues on the conservative blog WorldNetDaily.

However, this post is nothing compared to Norris's earlier post on WorldNetDaily where he articulates his vision of a Chuck Norris White House in "If I am elected president." Here are highlights from his presidential agenda:

Turn the Rose Garden into a new fighting ring for the World Combat League, in which liberals and conservatives will fight for legislative leadership and priority.
Increase jobs in America by sending ninja teams to sabotage and steal them back from other countries.
Resolve the Iraq war by bringing all of our military personnel home immediately, then going over there by myself for "martial arts negotiations."
Convey my plan for world peace to the United Nations: taking the governor of California with me on our "kick butt and ask questions later" USO world tour.
Expose the real WMDs – my fists and feet.
Personally smoke out bin Laden by myself and round-house kick him all the way back to America, where my United Fighting Arts Federation will handle the justice issues.

There you have it, a very Chuck Norris election. And for good measure here are some other Chuck Norris video gems.

2007-11-14T11:37:00.000-08:00

NewTeeVee Live!

Check us out. I'll be live-blogging the event today with my colleague Chris Albrecht, so check out our sometimes frantic, often witty, and always caffeine-enhanced commentary here.

2007-11-06T16:31:00.000-08:00

Ze's Back

Even Ze is weighing in on the writer's strike. And he promises more too!

Continuing on the theme of strikes and things that start with the letter "z," I would like to bring the conversation around to the little reported threat of a lurch-out by the ZGA, the Zombies Guild of America.

Their demands are simple, often phrased in a mono-syllabic moan aimed in the direction of the living - brains. Specifically, more brains. This is not the first time zombies have united for their rights. Several marches have occurred for zombie rights, often with the rallying cry of "What do we want? BRAINS! When do we want them? BRAINS!"

You get the idea.

2007-11-03T20:13:00.000-07:00

The Writers' Strike And You

The Writers Guild of America (WGA) agreed this weekend to go on strike on Monday. What does this mean for you, simple media consumer? Well, first all of your daily talk shows - The Daily Show, Colbert Report, Tonight Show, Late Show, etc. - will have no writers. Next impacted will be your episodic prime time sitcoms and dramas, i.e. The Office and Lost. A few months later the American box office will take a hit as no new scripts have been signed. In the interim, reruns, foreign imports, and a "renaissance" of writer-free reality television will fill the vacuous airwaves.

Time to find some good books.

2007-10-29T23:34:00.000-07:00

CrankCast Vid Picks: Zombies Abound

Between the recent vogue of zombie-memehood and the advent of Halloween you can barely go out to the grocery store without tripping over some zombies. Here are some informational videos that will better prepare you for the eventual war between the living and the undead.

I chatted with Lee LeFever and he explained that a video like this one takes 30 to 40 hours to make. Also, a note for the San Franciscans: In case of a zombie attack we will rendezvous at the Costco on 10th and Harrison.

AtomFilms.com

This video has a really beautiful animation style. Watch how the background changes shades throughout the cartoon. And a good Hannibal Lecter reference goes well with zombies and a nice chianti.

I'm still sad that the Bush/Zombie Reagan ticket back in '04 was never recognized. However, Cheney is very zombiesque.

Zombie Crank would need coffee... and brains. Coffee and brains.

It's strange that a movie whose one-liner pitch is "Lassie, but with zombies" got made. But thank god it did.

Also, check out this cool project my buddy Bill Cammarack told me about at NTV in NYC. It's called Node666 and it's a video blog project where you can submit your own zombie experience in video link form. This episode,simply titled "Goddamn Zombies," is probably what my final hours would like, except if zombies touched my computers I'd totally start lobotomizing the zed-heads.

2007-10-21T21:38:00.000-07:00

Bioneers Day 2

Find more videos like this on Bioneers Community Network

2007-10-20T12:14:00.000-07:00

Bioneers Day 1

Find more videos like this on Bioneers Community Network

2007-10-19T22:30:00.000-07:00

Bioneers 2007

I am attending the 18th Annual Bioneers conference in San Rafael, CA. As the mission statement reads:

Founded in 1990, Bioneers is a nonprofit organization that promotes practical environmental solutions and innovative social strategies for restoring the Earth and communities.

"It's All Alive, It's All Intelligent, It's All Connected."

Bioneers offers pragmatic solutions that honor the living web of the natural world as the most fertile source of inspiration and models. It's all alive.

One of the beauties of biology is that its facts can become our metaphors, and these underlying codes serve as inspiring parables for how we can organize a more just, humane and authentically sustainable society. It's all intelligent.

Interdependence also teaches us that there are no single issues because it's one whole that can be addressed only by bringing together all the parts. Bioneers gathers people at the crossroads of ecological restoration, human health and social justice. It's all connected.

I'll be blogging and vlogging on the official Bioneers Community Network, so check out my stuff.

2007-10-17T23:01:00.000-07:00

Blog Action Day

Sooooooo... this is happened:

Old media disdainfully calls us "the blogosphere." Intweb dweebs call themselves "the blogger elite." The corporations whose stock prices we effect call us "the bloggerazzi." I like the last one the best.

More on Blog Action Day soon.